SPLIT ENDS: In a Panic, Statham Agrees to “The Mechanic”

Winner's "Mechanic".

Wigger's "Mechanic"?

If “Crank 2” didn’t give you enough Bald for your buck, you won’t like the sound of this:  desperate to retool his gears after dropping a box-office lemon, Jason Statham just signed on to a remake of Michael Winner’s Hair-heavy 1972 actioneer “The Mechanic”.  In it, he’ll take on the flip-haired character originally played by the legendary Charles Bronson.

Watch this video of Bronson’s Hair in action, and tell us this role wouldn’t be more fitting for “Crank”-conqueror Zac Efron instead:

Real good choice, Hairywood.  In any event, it remains to be seen how the Wannabald will handle his head this go round:  has he learned his lesson?  Will he finally trim down?  Or totally wig out?

The Bald’s in your court, Mr. Statham.

From ComingSoon.