“BALD”: The Making Of THX1138

April 29, 2009
Peer pressure works.

Lice-free since 1971.

Dig this short documentary (via Dailymotion) about the making (and particularly, the shaving) of George Lucas’s debut “THX 1138”.  In the doc, Lucas, always progressively Bald-friendly in his casting choices, faces down a typical Hollywood Baldist who simply can’t imagine that any girl will be willing to shave her precious long locks for his silly little Bald flick.

Where does “THX 1138” rank in the Greatest Bald Films Of All Time?

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Mike Tyson challenges Vin Diesel for Box Office Belt

April 10, 2009

The kid gloves are off.

The kid gloves are off.

Vin Diesel better watch his rearview, because coming up fast behind him is fellow Bald Wall Bruiser Iron Mike Tyson with his own movie, the creatively-named “Tyson”.  Tyson’s long career has had its share of ups and rape sentences, but now in middle-age and comfortably Bald, the former champ has apparently mellowed to such a degree that he was able to sit down with LA Weekly long enough to do an in-depth interview without biting anyone’s ear off.  Check it out:

Bald is not neccesarily beautiful in every case.

Bald is not neccesarily beautiful in every case.


BIMPWATCH: The Bimp Honored With Lifetime Achievement Award

April 6, 2009
Beauty and The Bimp.

Beauty and The Bimp.

Alpha-Bald Bruce Willis (a.k.a. The Bimp) was honored this weekend with the Sonoma International Film Festival’s Lifetime Achievement Award for his roles in Bald classics like “Pulp Fiction”, “12 Monkeys”, and “Live Free or Die Haired”.

Baldsploitation.

Baldsploitation.

"So I'm thinking about shaving it off for Fight Club, but I don't know...  what do you think?"

"So I'm thinking about shaving it off for Fight Club..." "Do it, kid."

It was also the Bimp’s first public appearance with Victoria’s Secret model Emma Heming since the two tied the knot — and as usual, the nubile newlywed was looking hot enough to put sweat on your scalp!

Skin is in.

Skin is in.


Bald Is Back: “Fast And Furious” Breaks B.O. Records

April 5, 2009
Back and Balder than ever.

ReVinge is a dish best served Bald.

All of Hollywood is pulling their Hair out today trying to figure out how “Fast And Furious” made a record-smashing $72 million over the weekend.  But we here at the Bald Wall weren’t surprised at all.  When you look at these other record-breaking debuts, a pattern clearly emerges:

xxx-225x300

“xXx” –  $46 million

bruce-willis-thumbnail

“Live Free or Die Hard” –   $48.3 million (most successful “Die Hard” in the series)

kevin-spacey-thumb“Superman Returns” –  $53.5 million

dr-manhattan-thumbnail“Watchmen” –  $55.2 million

imhotep“The Mummy Returns” –   $70.1 million

dr-evil“Austin Powers in Goldmember” –  $73 million

will-smith-thumb-1‘I Am Legend” –  $77.2 million  (highest December opening weekend ever)

morpheus-thumb“The Matrix Reloaded” –  $91.8 million  (biggest debut ever for an R-rated film)

patrick-stewart-thumb-1“X-Men:  The Last Stand” –  $107 million  (largest Memorial Day weekend opening ever)

Get the message, Hairywood.  Bald puts butts in the seats.  Better start expanding theaters for Crank 2 while you can.

And a hard-earned standing ovation to Bald Wall member Vinny D!!!

paloma_jimenez_jr_20080606Click here to see Vin’s vivacious wife Paloma Jimenez!


A Bald Affair To Remember

March 30, 2009
When I was 33... it was a very good year...

"When I was 33... it was a very good year..."

Oops! ...I Did It With Fred Durst

Oops! ...I Did Fred Durst

Fred Durst is known for constantly reminiscing on the early 2000’s with a glisten in his eye.  In this week’s People, Durst recalls with fondness his 2003 affair with fellow Bald Britney Spears:

“I look back on it as very interesting (in terms of) how things have been sort of unraveling for her since.  (But) it is what it is. I can sleep at night knowing I made decisions that I wanted to make. (Still) I’m a supporter. I was then, I guess I am now. …I just guess at the time it was taboo for a guy like me to be associated with a gal like her.”

Bravo to Britney for breaking that taboo (and this one, too).  Haired women should never be made to feel odd for having relationships with Bald men, and as our culture becomes more enlightened, these relationships are becoming more commonplace and accepted.

Yes, Britney could have chosen a less-mocked Bald for her foray into hair-free hedonism, but no one has ever tagged the “If You Seek Amy” singer as an arbiter of taste.  Durst is a passable example of the Bald Bad Boy archetype that few Haired women can resist.  It’s telling that her experience with Baldbanging left such an impression on Britney that she herself embraced the lifestyle soon afterwards.  As they say, “Once you go Bald…”