May 6, 2009
-"Hello?" -"Yippee ki yay, motherf@^&er."
When Alpha Bald Bruce Willis picked Emma Heming out of a casting call on “Perfect Stranger” and married her out of nowhere in a whirlwind romance, few had even heard of the young lingerie model. Media outlets scrambled for pictures of the Bald-loving beauty.
But when it comes to anything in the Willisphere, no one beats The Bald Wall to the punch. We’ve unearthed a brief clip of the bride-to-be practicing her walk down the aisle in the 2001 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. Brace yourself… for the Bimpress:
*Click here for more Emma Heming!
May 6, 2009
SPOTTED: The Bimp and his bethrothed arrive for the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Costume Institute Gala in New York, looking positively Emmaculate!
The Head carpet treatment.
May 6, 2009
Has there ever been a better time to be Bruce Willis? For some reason everyone from the Hollywood trades to the NY gossip mags decided to just spend some ink today raving about how awesome he is. From THR:
A Star Is Shorn.
Action stars may lose their currency as they move into their 50s. But Bruce Willis keeps on raking in the offers.
The star, who turned 54 last month, has been in discussions to shoot and fight his way through three action pics — a thriller for NuImage/Millenium titled “Inventory,” the CIA tale “Red” for Summit and the mob biopic “Scarpa” for Morgan Creek.
And NY Daily News says Willis has reached his “golden age”. We must agree. Though his long storied career has occasionally found him in some Hairy situations, His Baldness has come out on top, seemingly shaving the years off like so much scalp fuzz.
NEWS FLASH: It’s good to be The Bimp.
May 5, 2009
That's not a Rumer.
Despite Bimp Bruce Willis‘s recent nuptials to the stunning Emma Heming, The Bimp himself was caught sneaking a peek at young starlet Kate Bosworth at an event on Monday. Of course, Bosworth’s battled with the Bald and lost before in the stinker Superman Returns.
But who can blame the Bimp for browsing– he’s Bald, not blind!
UPDATE: Not the first time!
April 10, 2009
See Emma walk.
The Bimpress is back! Enjoy these highly NSFW pics of Bruce Willis‘s blushing bride strutting her stuff at the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.
April 6, 2009
Beauty and The Bimp.
Alpha-Bald Bruce Willis (a.k.a. The Bimp) was honored this weekend with the Sonoma International Film Festival’s Lifetime Achievement Award for his roles in Bald classics like “Pulp Fiction”, “12 Monkeys”, and “Live Free or Die Haired”.
"So I'm thinking about shaving it off for Fight Club..." "Do it, kid."
It was also the Bimp’s first public appearance with Victoria’s Secret model Emma Heming since the two tied the knot — and as usual, the nubile newlywed was looking hot enough to put sweat on your scalp!
Skin is in.
April 5, 2009
ReVinge is a dish best served Bald.
All of Hollywood is pulling their Hair out today trying to figure out how “Fast And Furious” made a record-smashing $72 million over the weekend. But we here at the Bald Wall weren’t surprised at all. When you look at these other record-breaking debuts, a pattern clearly emerges:
“xXx” – $46 million
“Live Free or Die Hard” – $48.3 million (most successful “Die Hard” in the series)
“Superman Returns” – $53.5 million
“Watchmen” – $55.2 million
“The Mummy Returns” – $70.1 million
“Austin Powers in Goldmember” – $73 million
‘I Am Legend” – $77.2 million (highest December opening weekend ever)
“The Matrix Reloaded” – $91.8 million (biggest debut ever for an R-rated film)
“X-Men: The Last Stand” – $107 million (largest Memorial Day weekend opening ever)
Get the message, Hairywood. Bald puts butts in the seats. Better start expanding theaters for Crank 2 while you can.
And a hard-earned standing ovation to Bald Wall member Vinny D!!!
Click here to see Vin’s vivacious wife Paloma Jimenez!