Bald Is Back: “Fast And Furious” Breaks B.O. Records

April 5, 2009
Back and Balder than ever.

ReVinge is a dish best served Bald.

All of Hollywood is pulling their Hair out today trying to figure out how “Fast And Furious” made a record-smashing $72 million over the weekend.  But we here at the Bald Wall weren’t surprised at all.  When you look at these other record-breaking debuts, a pattern clearly emerges:

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“xXx” –  $46 million

bruce-willis-thumbnail

“Live Free or Die Hard” –   $48.3 million (most successful “Die Hard” in the series)

kevin-spacey-thumb“Superman Returns” –  $53.5 million

dr-manhattan-thumbnail“Watchmen” –  $55.2 million

imhotep“The Mummy Returns” –   $70.1 million

dr-evil“Austin Powers in Goldmember” –  $73 million

will-smith-thumb-1‘I Am Legend” –  $77.2 million  (highest December opening weekend ever)

morpheus-thumb“The Matrix Reloaded” –  $91.8 million  (biggest debut ever for an R-rated film)

patrick-stewart-thumb-1“X-Men:  The Last Stand” –  $107 million  (largest Memorial Day weekend opening ever)

Get the message, Hairywood.  Bald puts butts in the seats.  Better start expanding theaters for Crank 2 while you can.

And a hard-earned standing ovation to Bald Wall member Vinny D!!!

paloma_jimenez_jr_20080606Click here to see Vin’s vivacious wife Paloma Jimenez!

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