May 6, 2009
-"Hello?" -"Yippee ki yay, motherf@^&er."
When Alpha Bald Bruce Willis picked Emma Heming out of a casting call on “Perfect Stranger” and married her out of nowhere in a whirlwind romance, few had even heard of the young lingerie model. Media outlets scrambled for pictures of the Bald-loving beauty.
But when it comes to anything in the Willisphere, no one beats The Bald Wall to the punch. We’ve unearthed a brief clip of the bride-to-be practicing her walk down the aisle in the 2001 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. Brace yourself… for the Bimpress:
*Click here for more Emma Heming!
April 22, 2009
THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS!
As the world awaits the birth of a purrrrfectly pretty new Bald (with both an Academy Award and a Razzie to her name), we here at The Bald Wall will keep you up to date on the Last Days of Halle’s Hair.
The Last Days Of Halle Hairy
Truth be told, Halle is practically an honorary Bald already. Not only did she star in Fred Durst’s “Behind Blue Eyes” video (as Durst’s love interest — now that’s acting!), it was her film with Bruce Willis that led to him selecting meeting his bimptastic new wife (and yes, there was that John Travolta “Swordfish” movie if you’re keeping count).
If you ask us, it’s high-time Halle joined our ranks for real. But we like how she’s stretching it out for maximum anticipation — this is one actress who knows how to milk a moment.
Stretch it out, Halle.
April 12, 2009
Well, well, well. Vin Diesel’s got the #1 movie in the country, Bruce Willis has a Victoria’s Secret model wearing his ring, Bald is being declared “cool” in the papers, and all of a sudden everybody’s breaking out the clippers in a race to the bandwagon. Case in point:
Her better half.
What? You don’t recognize her? Why, that’s pretty-girl-who-wants-to-be-a-singer-and-an-actress-and-a-princess Cassie, who decided to try and catch some of that current Bald Heat for herself… but apparently thought she could get away with just a little on the side.
Nah, sister. No matter what your Haired Svengali Puff Diddy thinks, you can’t just sample Bald. You want to sell albums, you go all the way. Otherwise, you’re trying to play both sides of the court, and let’s face it: you’re no Michael Jordan.
How To Be A Player.
(That’s not to say we’re above posting a gallery of her.)
April 1, 2009
Who’s that girl?
None other than sultry “Transformers 2” actress Megan Fox, who revealed her newly bald pate last night at the premiere for Seth Rogen laffer “Observe And Report“.
The sexy siren shaved her head for an upcoming role in Fox 2000’s remake of “Alien Nation“. The original 1988 science fiction film about a family of aliens trying to adapt to earthly suburban life was a smart allegory about racism and sexism, and spawned an acclaimed television series which only ran for one season but has since become a cult classic. In the new film, Fox will play alien Susan Francisco, a “Newcomer” who lobbies for the right to vote.
And speaking of newcomers… welcome to the club, Megan!
UPDATE: APRIL FOOLS!
ACCEPT OUR APOLOGIES:
*Click here to see Vin Diesel‘s vivacious wife Paloma Jimenez!
*Click here for Bruce Willis‘s Victoria’s Secret vixen Emma Heming!
*Click here for half-assed head-shaver Cassie Ventura!